[8] After finishing The Lord of the Rings, Peter Jackson tackled a remake of his favorite film, King Kong. Jackson’s remake is largely faithful to the 1933 original, while generously expanding the storyline and embellishing some of the characters. Jackson protracts the opening act more than necessary, but his interpretation of Skull Island is amazing. It’s this middle portion of the movie that delivers the …
[7] Soldiers fight werewolves in rural Scotland in Dog Soldiers. Neil Marshall’s (The Descent, Doomsday) directorial debut is a worthwhile, claustrophobic werewolf movie featuring a sophisticated group of personalities and some of the best on-set werewolf effects I’ve ever seen. The first thirty minutes are a bit of a chore to get through, but once the characters make their last stand in a remote cottage, …
[5] You know the drill: a family moves into a new home, weird shit starts happening, SURPRISE. Ghosts. A Haunting in Connecticut is a so-so haunted house movie with some interesting concepts and hackneyed execution. The mother-son relationship between Kyle Gallner and Virginia Madsen is almost strong enough to keep you invested, but the movie ultimately aschews character and becomes desperately preoccupied with plot twists …
[7] Robert Rodriquez and Frank Miller join forces, with a little help from guest director Quentin Tarantino, to bring Miller’s much-loved Sin City to the screen. The result is less a film adaptation than a graphic novel come to life. The color palette is restrained, usually resorting to faithful recreations of Miller’s black and white panel work. The hyper-stylized approach works well for a movie …
[6] Just when you thought the Nazi zombie subgenre was dead, Scandinavia gives us Dead Snow. For those who find the concept appealing, the movie cuts the mustard, as well as several arteries. Unfortunately, a hackneyed plot, stock characters, and a scarcity of memorable gags keep Dead Snow from transcending our expectations. The lack of originality is counterbalanced by the movie’s brisk pace and a …
[2] A bunch of sad, scowling, mopey teenagers cry and whine for two hours because they’re afraid to fuck each other. Some of them are vampires, some of them are werewolves, but nothing ever comes of it. And the main girl? Man, let me tell you. This chick is in MASSIVE need of some serious fucking. If she doesn’t get laid soon, I don’t know …
[7] Kathryn Bigelow (Strange Days, Near Dark) won the Oscar for directing this suspense thriller about three soldiers who disarm bombs in Iraq. The movie also won Best Picture, maybe just because nothing better came out during the year (except the REAL best picture, District 9, but I digress). It’s far from groundbreaking and surprisingly predictable — but it’s a brisk, entertaining flick that hits …
[7] Precious is the kind of movie a studio exec must dread hearing a pitch about: “So, there’s this girl, and she’s really sad, her daddy raped her, she named her down syndrome baby Mongo, her mother violently abuses her, she’s HIV-positive, and, yeah, it really sucks to be her.” Surprisingly, Precious doesn’t wallow in melodrama. It plays straight-forward and honest, and you really start …
[6] Drew Barrymore makes her directorial debut with what is basically a high school sports movie. It reminded me of those ’80s flicks where the young guy (be it Cruise, Bacon, Lowe, or Modine) commited himself to a sport his parents frowned upon, and then ended up winning their respect by winning the game. Well, just change the ‘him’ to a ‘her’ and make the …
[6] Shane Acker’s computer-animated post-apocalyptic fantasy is visually interesting, but the characters are bland and the story is wobbly. The movie is a tonal quagmire, trying to balance its dark and dreary subject matter with a kid-friendly PG-13 rating. The plot starts off unimpressively, presenting the aftermath of a future conflict between humans and machines, and surprise, surprise — we lost. The more interesting concept …
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