[3] I enjoyed the blend of dark humor and horror that Eli Roth brought to his first film, Cabin Fever. And even though it was pretty much torture porn, I thought Hostel had merit, too. But The Green Inferno is a mess to me. I instantly hated the characters. Granted, I think we’re supposed to hate them, but since the whole cannibal thing doesn’t really …
[8] Every spring, I feel jaded when it comes to Hollywood tent pole flicks, and every summer I end up being surprised at how much I enjoy a few of them. Maybe it’s a result of low expectations, or maybe I love monster movies and disaster movies so much, they just have to be pretty shitty before I’ll give ’em the thumbs down. Anyway, I’ll …
[8] George Miller has stopped making talking pig and dancing penguin movies (Babe, Happy Feet) long enough to give us another installment in his seminal apocalyptic Mad Max series. The result is probably one of the greatest non-stop action movies ever made. Tom Hardy takes the reigns from Mel Gibson as the title character, but gets to sink his teeth into the role quite a …
[4] Around the World in 80 Days is a three-hour-long, episodic adventure that’s high on spectacle and low on story or character. I wager it played better to a 1950s audience interested in seeing a cliche-ridden “It’s a Small World”-like pastiche of world cultures. I wish leading actor David Niven had more to do in his role — it could have really helped the film …
[7] Cherry 2000 is good corny fun. It takes place in a somewhat post-apocalyptic 2017 (almost there!) where gender dynamics and sex politics have gotten so complicated, that many men prefer to bond with robots rather than flesh-and-blood women. That’s the part of the movie that genuinely fascinates me — but these ideas are dealt with pretty early on, with the rest of the film …
[8] Christopher Nolan (Inception, Memento) co-writes and directs this emotional sci-fi adventure about a farmer (Matthew McConaughey) who leaves his family during the last generation of human life on Earth, hoping to find a new planet for the species to call home. With the help of a secret rag-tag team of NASA scientists, he makes a two-year voyage to Saturn where a wormhole makes the …
[8] James Gunn (Slither) co-writes and directs one of the best Marvel movies ever. The plot is simple, nothing new or groundbreaking. Good guys gotta stop bad guys from literally destroying the world. Been there, done that, right? And like most Marvel movies, the bad guys are pretty generic and forgettable. And there are, like, what? Three or four bad guys here? Anyway, it doesn’t …
[7] I’m always on the lookout for a good monster movie, and Godzilla is one of the most legendary monsters in movie history, right? But he’s still not a sure thing. We all remember the Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich crap-fest from 1998, right? Well, thank goodness Monsters director Gareth Edwards takes the big lizard more seriously than they did. And thank goodness Edwards knows …
[4] Frank Sinatra stars as a US army captain in charge of helping Kachin natives in WWII Burma defend themselves against the Japanese. Never So Few divides its attention between the gun battles in the jungle and Sinatra’s makeout sessions with Italian beauty Gina Lollobrigida. As a result, it excels in neither area — I didn’t much care about the troops or the lady, and …
[5] Robert Shaw and Edward Fox reprise the roles originated by Gregory Peck and David Niven in The Guns of Navarone for this matinee adventure sequel. Shaw and Fox are led by Harrison Ford as a U.S. Colonel and joined by Carl Weathers (Rocky) as an arrested army sergeant on the run. Together, the team must complete two separate, secret missions — to kill a …
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