[7] Mommie Dearest is something else. I can’t tell if it’s trying to be an earnest expose on the turbulent home life of legendary star Joan Crawford and her adopted daughter, Christina, or if the dark comedy and camp value were intentional. The film is based on Christina’s tell-all book, so we really only get the nastiest parts of the story — how Joan locked her daughter …
[4] Bill Condon (Gods and Monsters) co-wrote this low-budget horror flick that dovetails two storylines — one involving a scientist medically experimenting on teenagers to turn them into controlled assassins, and one about a widower sheriff trying to solve the mystery surrounding his wife’s death many years ago. Despite competent leads in Michael Murphy as the sheriff and Dan Shor (Tron) as his son-turned-assassin, and …
[2] German WWII soldiers killed and tossed into a French lake come back for revenge in this underwater Nazi zombie flick that is mostly famous for its generous amount of full-frontal female splendor. But it pretty much fails on all other counts: terrible makeup effects, chintzy war recreation scenes, underwater photography that was obviously shot in a YMCA pool, and a ridiculously sentimental subplot involving a …
[3] A Jew and a Christian compete in the 1924 Olympics, both running in the name of God and adversity. I’m sorry to say I just couldn’t give a shit. I couldn’t empathize with their motivations. They feel God when they run. Good for them. It would at least be nice if the two competed against one another in the third act, but they don’t. …
[6] A sexually infatuated twelve-year-old boy does what his teddy bear tells him to, which includes feeding the locals to a pack of monsters who dwell in a pit in the woods. I don’t know what the teddy bear and the pit monsters have to do with one another, but the first half of The Pit is remarkable in its depiction of a nascent psychopath. …
[6] When a WWII vet returns home to find his true love in the arms of another man, the town scores a legendary double-murder. Thirty-five years later, the town decides to throw the same dance… and the killer decides to pay a return visit. It may not be as famous as Jason or Michael’s outings, but The Prowler is a quintessential slasher film nonetheless. Tom …
[7] Four old men and their families are haunted by the ghost of a woman the men accidentally killed decades ago in this John Irvin film of the Peter Straub story. It could have benefited from a more visionary director, because it really only taps the surface of its atmospheric potential but Ghost Story is otherwise a solid spook tale of ghostly revenge that kept …
[5] Sidney Lumet (Network, Dog Day Afternoon) directs the true story of a New York cop seeking redemption for some corrupt deeds. The undercover cop, played by Treat Williams, reluctantly becomes an informant for a special investigatory committee, only to have the committee strong-arm him into ratting out his friends and fellow cops. Williams is all right in the role, but I feel that perhaps …
[6] In order to make The Dark Crystal, Jim Henson and company first had to make the financiers a sequel to their successful Muppet Movie. And so The Great Muppet Caper was born. It’s not as epic or inspirational as the first film, and the songs are nowhere near as magical either, but the sequel isn’t too shabby in its own right. Kermit, Fozzy, and …
[7] This stand-alone slasher flick from Bob and Harvey Weinstein (the first Miramax film production) rivals the best of the Friday the 13th fare. The requisite nubile flesh and gory kill scenes are here, but the teen protagonists are more likable than usual and the film creates a genuinely creepy atmosphere throughout. With its lakeside camp setting and deformed villain, The Burning isn’t going to …
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