Bird on a Wire (1990)
[5] Bird on a Wire is a big, goofy Hollywood action spectacular with two likeable stars at its center. Mel Gibson plays an FBI informant in witness protection and Goldie Hawn plays an old flame he left at the altar when the…
Force 10 from Navarone (1978)
[5] Robert Shaw and Edward Fox reprise the roles originated by Gregory Peck and David Niven in The Guns of Navarone for this matinee adventure sequel. Shaw and Fox are led by Harrison Ford as a U.S. Colonel and joined by Carl…
Heartburn (1986)
[4] Meryl Streep stars as a food critic reluctant to remarry. But who can resist the charm of Jack Nicholson? The two marry and squeeze out a kid, and then sure enough, he cheats on her and the infidelity escalates from there.…
Naked Lunch (1991)
[3] I want to be nice to this movie because so many of my friends adore it. But I've pondered this review for over a month and can't put it off any longer. I don't like this movie. Like, at all. I'm…
The Loved Ones (2009)
[8] Half-way through The Loved Ones, I was hating it all over. The fact that it won me back impresses the shit out of me. It's an Australian horror flick about a hapless teenager struggling with survivor's guilt (Xavier Samuel) who gets…
To Be or Not To Be (1983)
[7] Mel Brooks and Anne Bancroft star as leaders of a Polish theater troop forced to entertain the Nazis while simultaneously plotting their escape to Allied territory. You might think the material is too heavy for a comedy, but To Be or…
Birth (2004)
[6] Nicole Kidman stars as a recently widowed woman who meets a young boy claiming to be her husband reincarnated. Jonathan Glazer (Sexy Beast) directs from a script he co-wrote, keeping the true nature of the piece shrouded in mystery until just…
Scrooged (1988)
[5] I thought I'd get a lot more from a dark comedy directed by Richard Donner (Superman, Lethal Weapon) and starring Bill Murray, but Scrooged is neither dark nor funny enough to leave much of a lasting impression. Murray plays a cutthroat…
Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)
[6] Gizmo the cute Mogwai is back, and he gets wet again -- this time in a New York City skyscraper run by a Donald Trump-like billionaire. Billy Peltzer and Kate Beringer (returning stars Zach Galligan and Phoebe Cates) both work there…
Tarzan the Ape Man (1932)
[6]
Call me a sucker for an Olympic swimmer in a loincloth, but I enjoy Johnny Weissmuller’s maiden swing through the jungle. This first feature in the long running matinee series is the one where Tarzan meets Jane (Maureen O’Sullivan), whose on expedition with her father to find a fabled elephant graveyard. He kidnaps her, but then she saves him from her angry father, he learns a little English (“Me Tarzan, you Jane”), and the two fall in love. Hey, if it can happen that fast for the J-Lo, it can happen that fast for the Lord of the Apes.