[6] It’s shiny and exciting to look at, a gorgeous smorgasbord of fantastic sets, wardrobe, make-up, and visual effects. But it’s also grotesquely over-produced, almost turning these assets into something garish and distracting. It’s a shame the considerable talents of Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, and Natalie Portman couldn’t be put to better use. All three appear insufferably constrained in their roles. Jake Lloyd as young …
[2] Glaciers move faster than Robert Altman’s bleak post-apocalyptic drama. The ice-age backdrop is the only interesting thing about Quintet, but it’s completely irrelevant to the story line. Paul Newman plays one of the last survivors of the human race, all of whom hole up and play board games, waiting to die. One group of players ups the ante by wagering people’s lives. Something of …
[8] In a not-too-distant future Japan, the government cracks down on adolescent shenanigans by randomly selecting one 9th grade class per year to duke it out on a remote island until only one student is standing. Battle Royale starts off with a good dose of operatic, dark humor, but as the teenage body count rises, you actually get to know many of the embattled kids …
[4] Just six years after directing The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, director Eugene Lourie goes back to the well for another giant lizard movie, only this time the monster is radioactive. While production values are high for a low-budget British production (British B-movies put American B-movies to shame, really), the resulting film is a far less successful one. Willis O’Brien’s stop-motion animation in the last …
[5] Brian DePalma (curiously) directs this wonky sci-fi action flick about a team of astronauts sent to Mars to look for survivors after the first manned mission to the Red Planet encounters a mysterious storm. There’s also something about the giant face on Mars — you know, the one that shows up in some NASA photos? The third act of this movie takes you inside …
[8] Matt Damon carries this Ridley Scott (Blade Runner, Gladiator) film based on the book by Andy Weir. Half the film is practically a one-man show, with Damon playing a NASA astronaut feared dead and accidentally abandoned on Mars for several years. The other half of the run-time is split between Earth and the returning Mars spacecraft. Once NASA discovers Damon’s character is still alive, …
[6] A scientist sends a man with dangerous telepathic powers on a mission to destroy a renegade adversary with similar powers. David Cronenberg (Videodrome, The Dead Zone) wrote and directed Scanners, so you know it’s sure to be a bit slow-paced and sublimely melancholy, but with a couple moments of unforgettable gore. Here the big visceral accent comes about fifteen minutes in, when the bad …
[5] Three scientists and a guy from off the street discover a crashed meteor that is begetting alien life forms that are evolving into monsters at a dangerous rate in this fantasy comedy from Ivan Reitman (Ghostbusters, Stripes). On one hand, Evolution is passable entertainment, but on the other hand, it’s hard to shake the feeling that it’s made on cold, left-over inspiration from Ghostbusters. …
[6] The sequel to Predator drops Arnold Schwarzenegger and transplants the action to Los Angeles. Danny Glover stars as a cop trying to break up warring drug gangs when the Predator drops into the action and leads him on a mysterious hunt for clues. Gary Busey shows up as a secret government military man, and Glover’s got police support from the likes of Maria Conchita …
[8] Every spring, I feel jaded when it comes to Hollywood tent pole flicks, and every summer I end up being surprised at how much I enjoy a few of them. Maybe it’s a result of low expectations, or maybe I love monster movies and disaster movies so much, they just have to be pretty shitty before I’ll give ’em the thumbs down. Anyway, I’ll …
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