[7] Cherry 2000 is good corny fun. It takes place in a somewhat post-apocalyptic 2017 (almost there!) where gender dynamics and sex politics have gotten so complicated, that many men prefer to bond with robots rather than flesh-and-blood women. That’s the part of the movie that genuinely fascinates me — but these ideas are dealt with pretty early on, with the rest of the film …
[6] It’s not nearly as good as its predecessor, but I kinda like two out of the three tales in Creepshow 2. The first story, Old Chief Wood’nhead, is about a wooden statue that comes alive to avenge the murder of a kindly old couple played by George Kennedy and Dorothy Lamour. Kennedy and Lamour are sweet, but the episode is too hackneyed to leave …
[4] Bless Patrick Dempsey for acting his little heart out in this schmaltzy, cliche-ridden ’80s overdose. It’s basically a story of boy rents girl. Dempsey’s character is a loser who pays a popular girl (Amanda Peterson, also acting her heart out) one thousand dollars to be his girlfriend for a month. Since she’s in a pinch for the cash, she agrees and kinda falls in …
[6] If you were making a movie based on a famous toy line and you had no choice but to cast Dolph Lundgren in the lead, you probably couldn’t do much better than Gary Goddard did with Masters of the Universe. The screenplay by David Odell (The Dark Crystal) transplants the action from He-Man’s homeworld to our own planet. I’m sure this was a cost-cutting …
[4] Somehow, Oscar-winners Rod Steiger (In the Heat of the Night) and Kim Hunter (A Streetcar Named Desire) got swindled into starring in this sub-par creature feature about a scientist (Hunter) who performs Frankenstein-like genetic experiments in her basement. On her deathbed, she begs her son (a wooden David Allen Brooks) to destroy her experiments before it’s too late. And wouldn’t you know it? One …
[6] A nasty heiress (Goldie Hawn) falls off her yacht and gets amnesia, only to be discovered by a handyman (Kurt Russell) she once screwed over. To get revenge, he convinces her that she’s his wife and the mother of his three unruly sons. Overboard‘s screenplay mines the tried-and-true ‘fish out of water’ scenario to great effect, but make no mistake about it — this …
[2] The short review: WTF? The longer review: From the first opening frame, you know right away this is a cheap, watered down, bargain basement Superman movie. (Thank you, Golan-Globus Productions!) But even if you can overlook the astonishingly awful visual effects, the movie will still disappoint you in other more substantial ways. For starters, the dialogue is pointed, the relationship between Clark and Lois …
[10] In the not-so-distant future, a Detroit policeman is murdered by a vicious cop-killer, only to be resurrected as the ultimate cyborg law enforcer. But will RoboCop have free will, or will he be slave to the corporation that facilitated his rebirth? On one level, RoboCop is an action film sprinkled with generous amounts of extreme violence and gore. But the movie also has unexpected …
[10] Holly Hunter and Nicolas Cage star as Ed and Hi, a police woman and a supposedly reformed felon who try to start a family in Joel and Ethan Coen’s Raising Arizona. But when they can’t conceive a child of their own, they decide to kidnap a tot from a wealthy couple who just had septuplets. The demands of new parenthood take their toll on …
[9] Clive Barker holds nothing sacred, least of all flesh, in exploring the fine line between love and pain in this sado-masochistic fantasy. The movie throbs with an intense, dark passion — dark enough for a woman to love the skinless man living in her attic. Clare Higgins delivers the movie’s best performance as the brooding, lust-driven Julia. Her sinister relationship with her dead ex-lover …
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