[5] Spoilers ahead. A group of immortal beings called Eternals were sent to Earth centuries ago to fight a bunch of monsters called Deviants so the human race could survive and thrive. After all the monsters were vanquished, the Eternals lived among the humans for eons and kinda fell in love with them. So it really sucks when they learn they’ve been lied to by …
[5] Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L. Jackson star in this tepid action/comedy that feels too inspired by buddy flicks like Lethal Weapon and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang for its own good. Reynolds plays a down-and-out bodyguard hired to protect an incarcerated hitman (Jackson) while he’s escorted to trial where he’ll testify against a deadly dictator (Gary Oldman). The plot is a hack job if there …
[7] Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg co-wrote and co-produced this R-rated animated satire about a grocery store hot dog (voiced by Rogen) that discovers the truth about life outside the store’s sliding glass doors. But it’s an uphill battle to convince the rest of the grocery denizens that their idea of ‘heaven’ is actually the gnashing teeth of human beings! Sausage Party delivers all the naughty sexual …
[7] Robert Rodriguez directs from a script polished by Kevin Williamson in this fun high school body snatchers horror flick. Piper Laurie, Jon Stewart, Salma Hayek, Robert Patrick, Bebe Neuwirth, and Famke Janssen play the title characters, members of an Ohio high school who are the first victims of a parasitic alien invasion. Once the brainwashed grownups start infecting the student body, it’s up to …
[5] If you love the Muppets, this eighth Muppet movie won’t disappoint you too badly, though it’s far from their best effort. Director James Bobin (Flight of the Conchords) and writer Nicholas Stoller return for their second entry in the franchise, after the great success of 2011’s The Muppets. This time, Kermet is replaced with the world’s most dangerous frog, a Russian gulag escapee named …
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