[4]

Director Chris Columbus hacks his own Harry Potter films with this knockoff that substitutes wizards with Greek Gods, Quidditch with swordplay, and Hogwarts for a corny renaissance festival in the woods. Young star Logan Lerman, the illegitimate son of Justin Bieber and Zac Efron, strikes a nice pose but lacks charisma. The only actors who leave an impression are Brandon T. Jackson as Percy's half-goat sidekick and Uma Thurman as a Gloria Swanson-esque Medusa. The script moves at a punishing pace, attempting (and failing) to short-shrift its first act and opting to steer clear of any and all grace notes, even when Percy's mother is seemingly killed before his eyes. The second act is stuck in an episodic quest for magic pearls, and the third act spirals into a cloying, emotionally hollow father/son moment.

If I had to say something nice about Percy Jackson, I guess it would be that at least it has more action (infinitely more) than most Potter films, and that it returns a tone of light-hearted wonder to children’s fantasy that the Potter franchise traded for grim realism about three films into the series.