[6]

Call me a sucker for an Olympic swimmer in a loincloth, but I enjoy Johnny Weissmuller’s maiden swing through the jungle. This first feature in the long running matinee series is the one where Tarzan meets Jane (Maureen O’Sullivan), whose on expedition with her father to find a fabled elephant graveyard. He kidnaps her, but then she saves him from her angry father, he learns a little English (“Me Tarzan, you Jane”), and the two fall in love. Hey, if it can happen that fast for the J-Lo, it can happen that fast for the Lord of the Apes.

Jack the Giant Slayer (2013)

November 28, 2013

[5] They were re-writing the script for Jack the Giant Slayer while they shot the movie, and it shows. It's a bit of a hot mess. I'm a fan of director Bryan Singer (The Usual Suspects, X-Men) and I'm down…

Gravity (2013)

October 4, 2013

[6]

Gravity is so harrowing, I’m tempted to call it crisis porn. The movie stars Sandra Bullock and George Clooney as astronauts stranded in orbit over Earth after debris destroys their spacecraft. Director Alfonso CuarÃ³n (Children of Men, A Little Princess) warns us from the get-go with some on-screen text that life in space is impossible, and then proceeds to throw everything you can imagine at Bullock and Clooney’s characters. They’ve got dwindling oxygen supplies, they’ve got the debris looping back around at them every ninety minutes, their spacesuits are running out of propulsion, and their connection to Huston has gone dark. There are the threats of burning alive, freezing to death, drowning, and slipping into coma. They see other members of their crew frozen solid, flesh exposed to the vacuum of space — one guy with a tidy hole clean through his head.

Ladyhawke (1985)

July 29, 2013

[7] Two lovers are bewitched by a jealous Bishop -- the man (Rutger Hauer) is transformed into a wolf by night, the woman (Michelle Pfeiffer) is a hawk by day. They only see each other in human form for a…

Alexander (2007)

July 12, 2013

[6]

Oliver Stone’s epic bio of the Macedonian military legend, like so many pet projects, is a glorious mess of a movie. The screenplay goes back and forth in time, mixing scenes of Alexander’s youth with scenes of his conquests. The result is jarring, never allowing you to get to know the character in any time. The narrative also relies far too much on Anthony Hopkins’ narration to explain what is going on. Stone has an Academy Award for writing Midnight Express, but his writing on Alexander seems like the clunky work of an amateur.

The Most Dangerous Game (1932)

July 11, 2013

[7] An eccentric recluse hunts shipwrecked humans on a remote jungle island in The Most Dangerous Game, one of the earliest successful 'talkies'. The film's creative team (including producer Willis O'Brien and director Ernest B. Schoedsack) would next bring us…

Mutiny on the Bounty (1935)

July 11, 2013

[8]

You know you’re in for a harrowing journey when the ship’s captain gives a dead man 300 lashes before the ship even leaves port. Charles Laughton steals the show here as the torturous Captain Bligh, a greedy monster who plays recklessly with the lives of his crew. Clark Gable is charismatic as Fletcher Christian, the man who leads the uprising against Bligh (and without his trademark mustache, since facial hair wasn’t permitted in the Royal Navy). Franchot Tone is very good as Roger Byam, a friend of Christian’s who ultimately sides with Bligh… a decision that nearly costs him his life. All three actors were Oscar-nominated for their roles, and the film won the award for Best Picture.

Spartacus (1960)

July 11, 2013

[8]

Fans of Ridley Scott’s Gladiator might be surprised how much they will also enjoy (perhaps even prefer) its progenitor. Stanley Kubrick’s Spartacus is a briskly-paced epic, and uncharacteristically emotional compared to his other work. Kirk Douglas is iconic in the lead role, playing a slave forced to fight in the gladiatorial arena for the enjoyment of the aristocracy. Of course he falls in love with a fellow slave girl, of course he escapes, and of course he leads a mammoth army of slaves in revolt against Rome… but when these broad strokes are painted so earnestly, I don’t care. The bleak, bold final act of the film is what really sells the story for me.

The Lone Ranger (2013)

July 10, 2013

[5]

Armie Hammer (The Social Network) stars as the legendary masked man while Johnny Depp picks up the mantle of Tonto in this big-budget version of The Lone Ranger from director Gore Verbinski (The Ring) and producer Jerry Bruckheimer. It’s painfully obvious that the creative team is working very hard to rekindle the flame they ignited with the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, complete with improbable action set-pieces that rise up out of nowhere and characterizations as broad as the old-fashioned melodramas the film is based on.

World War Z (2013)

July 8, 2013

[7]

Brad Pitt admirably carries this big-budget zombie apocalypse flick that has more in common with Outbreak or Contagion than it does your standard zombie fare — don’t expect blood and gore, horror fans. Director Marc Forster (Monster’s Ball, Stranger Than Fiction) succeeds in ratcheting up the tension with a script (based very loosely on Max Brooks’ book) that is essentially one dramatic escape sequence after another.